Change is an inevitable part of the workplace, whether it involves a new project, reorganization, leadership shifts, or adapting to new tools and processes. While change is unavoidable, it can also bring uncertainty, discomfort, and even grief.
Remember everyone approaches change differently, at their own pace, experiencing moments of progress and setbacks along the way.
The journey is rarely linear; we may find ourselves oscillating between the old and the new. And as you muddle your way through change, remember the most important part: be kind.
Through the triggers of grief, we all need gentle support during such times. We need to be held gently when we are grieving.
If you can't find it in your heart to be gentle and kind, just move on. If you can’t help someone process their grief, do no harm. And it's not always necessary to comment on everyone’s pain.
So, how can leaders and colleagues better support one another during challenging transitions?
Here are 4 approaches I would like to share:
1. Watch out for contempt
“What’s the big deal?” “Why are you still upset?” “Just move on already.”
Contempt dismisses pain and shames people for having very human reactions.
👉 Tap into compassion
“This is really hard. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”
Compassion allows space for the hurt and offers presence instead of judgment.
2. Watch out for blame, criticism, and fury
“This is your fault.” “I warned you.” “You should’ve known better.”
Blame creates defensiveness and shame, closing the door to healing.
👉 Tap into curiosity
“What has this been like for you?” “What do you wish others understood right now?” Curiosity softens the conversation and invites connection through understanding.
3. Watch out for the fixer
“Let me tell you what you need to do.” “Here’s how to solve it.”
Jumping straight into fixing denies people the space to feel and be heard.
👉 Tap into holding space
“What do you need right now?” “Would it help to just talk through it?”
Holding space honors the person’s experience instead of rushing to resolve it.
4. Watch out for disappointment and dismissal
“You’re being too negative.” “Can you stop complaining already?”
These comments minimize grief and shut people down when they most need support.
👉 Tap into the dream behind the complaint
“What were you hoping for?” “What feels lost right now?” “What part of this change hurts the most?” When we listen for the dream underneath the frustration, we invite healing and meaning.
This practice is especially crucial in environments where change is constant, such as Agile transformations, company restructuring, or other significant workplace shifts. Leading with empathy, holding space, and offering genuine support are courageous acts that contribute to organizational success.
What would you add to this list? How can we better support each other during times of workplace change?
If this message resonates with you, let’s connect. Reach out for a free 30-minute consultation, and together, we’ll explore how to navigate change with kindness and create a culture of support in your workplace.
Attribution:
All Wisdom belongs to: CRR Global, Co-Active Training Institute, Madison Butler 🏳️🌈🦄 , Marc Lesser, The Gottman Institute.
All flaws belong to me.
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